Sometimes a great idea can be destroyed by Idiots.   One truly great idea is the Outside Urinal.

I am sure almost everyone can relate to that “Oh Yeah, I’ve really got to go Pee NOW urge! --.   You know that feeling that sneaks up on you when you have been drinking the night away at a crowded bar with your friends.  You stand up and start to head for the bathroom, slowly at first but then realize that time is of the essence.    You arrive at the bathroom just about to burst.   You run out the front door of the bar desperately hoping there is a tree or bush to hide behind, but the only place out of public view is an alley that smells like stale urine.    You see a couple of guys peeing on the wall and you join them.  Or, maybe you run to the dumpster at the end of the alley hoping for a modicum of privacy.   Just as you whip it out and start to pee you notice some poor girl looking at you squat pissing a few feet away from you.  She looks at you with your wang in your hand and gives you -  a what the fuck are you doing asshole, I was he first look.    You try to stop mid-piss, but as any man will tell you, this is impossible. 

So, I was pleasantly surprised to hear that San Francisco recently installed an outdoor urinal in Dolores Park.     I figured I would step out of my comfort zone a bit and give it a try.     I arrived at about six in the evening and I half expected to see a dozen pubs and bars in the area.    I had originally planned to go into a bar, have a couple of drinks, and then walk out casually and use the urinal.   Instead of finding bars or night clubs near the urinal, I find a nice park located in a residential neighborhood.  The park has trees and a playground and even normal bathrooms.   Why in the world do you need to put an outdoor urinal here?   

 

The city of San Francisco choice of location in the park is also strange.   It is right across from a trolley stop and along two busy streets.   Two sidewalks make it almost impossible to have any privacy.    Couldn’t they have found a better location in or near the park?   Heck, if there was not a urinal in this location I think you would be led away in cuffs if you tried to pee in this location.   As I look around there are literally a few dozen people would be able to see you pee.  I stay for about fifteen minutes trying to see if anyone uses the urinal.   No one does.

I look for somewhere to get something to drink so that I can at least have some urge to Pee but there was nothing.   I abandon my plans to test the urinal that day.

The next day I am determined to Step Out of my Comfort Zone and piss in that urinal.   I buy one of those 64 ounce drinks to make sure that I don’t talk myself out of using it.  I get to the park at about noon-time.   There are people all over the place.   As I finish up my drink I get that an urge to pee.   There are people at the trolley stop people on the sidewalks and cars parked at a stoplight.   There really is no way to pee without a small crowd seeing you.  I desperately hope to see someone else use the urinal before I have to use it.   After about ten minutes of waiting there is nothing I can do.   I rush to the urinal.   I unbuckle my jeans, zip my fly down and lower my compression shorts to exposing my dick in public.     There really is no other way to characterize the experience.

Oh no a couple of seconds go by and no PEE.   I realize I have stage fright and I cannot pee with so many people around.   I look up and there is a pretty young twenty something woman at the bus stop looking at me.   We make brief I contact and she quickly glances away.   From the angle and her reaction, I can tell there is no way she didn’t see me standing there holding my dick.    Then all of a sudden I am peeing like a race horse.   The next thirty seconds feel like an hour as people walk by continue what they were doing.    There really is very little privacy.    Dozens of joggers and walkers can see me standing there pissing men, women, young, old, attractive and not so attractive.    I can see a half dozen people at the trolley stop pretending not to notice as I stand just a few feet away pissing away.

I think sooner or later SF is going to close the urinal in down for lack of use.   What they should do is consider putting them in dim lit discrete locations where there are no bathrooms.   How about putting one near dumpster in the alley?   I know there will be plenty of users.

At least I stepped out of my comfort zone, and did something new.